Walking in the Shoes of My Ward: Story of Supporting People with Disability

If you have never met or cared for a person with a developmental disability, working and living with them can seem very overwhelming. I have worked with people with disabilities for almost a decade and what has been the most helpful for me is having the mindset of, “They are people who are no different from me.” This means that even if your ward has a disability, we all have the same needs and wants–to be happy, loved, and feel safe. When I started adopting this mindset, working with them felt less overwhelming and felt less like a burden.

One of the women I have worked with recently has severe cerebral palsy. She has very poor cognitive ability and she cannot speak. She cannot move most of her body by herself and so she cannot do any daily tasks independently and she uses a wheelchair. It was very difficult to know how to interact with her because she could not respond verbally or through gesturing or pointing. Approaching her with the mindset that she is no different from me and that she also has similar wants and needs as myself, I would treat her similarly as any other person. I would greet her hello and talk to her even if she cannot respond because by having her see and listen to my voice, we can be more familiar with each other. It took me a few weeks but with enough observation, I was able to become more familiar with her facial expressions and what they may mean. By presenting her with different activities she can participate in such as watching videos, listening to music, assisted arts and crafts, I can better understand her own likes and dislikes and adjust. This goes to show that no matter how severe your ward’s disability is, they are still similar to us in many ways and we can interact and build a relationship with them as with any other person.

Picture illustrated by Inna Abrogena

Many years ago when I was volunteering at a shelter for abandoned boys and men with disabilities, I was assigned to work with a man who was recently brought to the shelter after being found left alone at a bus terminal. He has severe intellectual disability but has no physical limitations. He cannot speak and he does not show any interest in activities aside from basic daily needs such as eating food, sleeping, and going to the toilet. It was very challenging because it feels like we do not connect and he ignores any activity I try to engage him in like drawing, coloring, music, or games. And since he had no ID or other information, we also don’t know his diagnosis and anything about his background. I asked for advice from my supervisor and what she told me was really helpful and gave me motivation to keep going. She said, “I understand working with him is difficult because nothing seems to work but give it time and don’t rush. What you’re doing now–talking to him, being with him, trying to play games with him–is already helping him even if you cannot see any outward change.”