Watching the video while your name was being called then you and your brother walked up the stage, I can’t hold my tears. Tears that still flow as I write this. My baby is now a big girl. My youngest, my unica hija. How I wish I was there with you but all I can do is watch you on my small screen as you receive your diploma. BS Accountancy.
I wonder how are you feeling right now. This is a milestone in your life, another one that I missed. I didn’t see this coming because in the past years, I promised myself that I’m not gonna miss this one. That no matter what, I will attend your college graduation. As early as April, I have already told my employer about my plan.
In a flash, a thought crossed my mind. In a short film I did for my project, I stated that I only attended your elementary graduation. I thought that was an unfinished film. That in the next film, I can say this is the moment I have been waiting for. That finally, I can walk you up the stage for your probably last graduation from school. Something that never happened. What I said in that film was final. I only attended your elementary graduation. Because of the pandemic, I wasn’t there on your 18th birthday and you were not able to have a much awaited celebration but we kept going.
Another thought led me back to that night before I left to work here. I was talking to you while you were asleep. I was in tears trying to explain to you why I had to leave because I couldn’t tell you when you are awake. I just can’t. You opened your eyes and wiped my tears not knowing that I was leaving that morning and will see me after 2 years God permits. I didn’t plan to be away this long.
How time flies. Where have all those nineteen years gone? Many important events missed but as a mother, I am so proud of what you have achieved not just academically but how you have become as a big girl in the midst of many trials and challenges that come your way. Thousands of days not having a mother to cuddle you or tuck you in. There were no videocalls or Facebook messenger to talk or chat with you everyday but we managed for over nineteen years!
I know this is tough but you are not alone. Many mothers and children all over the world are, were or will be in the same situation at some point in time. We share the same agony or sentiments somehow. I have learnt to embrace this life because my WHY is bigger than my pain. My DREAM is greater than my tears. I want to change the life of my future generation.
I may not be there on that very special day but I know that you understand. You are a brave and smart girl and I am so proud of you!
There will be many more trials and challenges because we live in a real world. For now, let me express how happy I am. You did it! We made it! Thank you and I can’t wait to see you reach your full potential.
“What is your reason why do you want to work in Hong Kong?”
This is the very question I was asked during my interview when I applied to work here. My employer repeated the question inside the lift when she picked me up from the agency.
” As I said in my interview, Ma’am, I want to give my children the best education I could because I want them to achieve what I did not.
I hope that this is the beginning of that change. “Dear child, congratulations from a distance!”